On Deadlines & Saying No

Earlier in the evening today I just realised I had missed the deadline for a small part of my school assignment by 2 days! Imagine my shock and denial. I had read through the whole assignment but had truly missed the deadline for the first part. Alhamdulillah I set myself on it tonight and I managed to get it done even though it’s super-late. I emailed my tutor too in hopes he will pardon me and give me a pass, at least. I really hope!

But I shan’t dwell on it too much, as it was a genuine mistake and there’s no point being too upset over it. It’s not the worst that can happen and I still have the chance to make it right for the second part of the assignment- the thousand word essay. 

And I hope to always remember this. That I may make mistakes sometimes but what’s important is what I do about it. That I will own up to it, try my best to make it right, learn from it and pray to Allah to ease my affairs. 

May Allah ease. And I can do this. 

Also, it dawned on me that I have two essay assignments due within several days which brought me to say no. No to supposed plans over the weekend and my plan to finish doing up the cards for a small project for some sisters. It kinda sucks because you wish you can do them all but this is it, a lesson for me ultimately from Allah. To prioritise and choose wisely and make sure I can allocate my all to all that I intend to do. 

Don’t Wait to Be Grateful!

Such is the reminder pertinent to myself as of today.

I was reading an article about 3 habits that will change your life and I’m glad I’m already practising one of it now that is, journaling. 
The app that I’m currently using is the Gratitude Journal App and it has been a tremendous tool! The interface is such that when you type in words/sentences of things you’re grateful for, you then need to click a “Yes, I am grateful” button below to save it. I like it as it kinda reinforces the value of gratitude in users. 

I try to do it at least once every day, usually at night before I sleep. In a way, I try to sleep with a grateful heart. It is so much comforting really, than going to sleep with an empty or distressed heart or weeping eyes. Honestly though, some days are harder. Some days I’m just glad I got through work, some days I’m just glad nothing ‘bad’ happened. Some days I just feel so ‘meh’ – like there’s nothing to be grateful for. But know that there is. Even if you can just think of one, or even if you think it’s not significant. If it’s so bad, look at others below you in terms of their living conditions and quality of life. Even if you don’t feel that gratitude in your heart coz we all have our days, helps to just bear in mind and tell yourself that there are some things out there, bigger than myself that are truly good. 

This week I havn’t been updating my gratitude journal app daily as I reached most nights too tired, too late at night to write etc. 

So I found myself entering things into the app past 6pm today and the golden reminder for me is that, don’t wait till night time to set aside time to be grateful for all the day’s happenings. This is because I don’t always have the luxury of time or the energy to it. So when I do get some quiet time to myself, I need to make it a point to pen down the things I want to be grateful to Allah swt for. 
Being grateful doesn’t cause the struggles, worries, negative vibes to disappear into thin air. It is still there. It is up to me, which one I choose to focus on. Focus on your blessings, or your deficiencies? Plus, heard of a super-great bonus from the One who gifts us with all these blessings? Yes. He promised that when we are grateful, He gives us more.  And Allah swt gives in His often subtle ways 🙂 
May Allah swt make us ever-grateful, and in us doing so, we attain His Love.

#airplanemode

11th floor. 

Everything else below seemed small. 

And so too are these you are carrying.

All your doubts, worries, insecurities, uncertainties, ongoing struggles. 

You are exactly who you are

Just human 

Ever so struggling

Always far from perfect 

And so is your life 

But no matter what

Keep in mind

That there’s always a bigger perspective 

There’s a bigger world out there 

While everything that may concern you is valid 

Not everything that is valid need to be dwelled upon 

Drowning and sinking deeper 

Is not a healthy way to live 

Therefore embrace the fact of the matter of your life in this world

Temporary it is 

Remember 

His Promises 

Of the everlasting abode 

That is 

Waiting.

When your mind is super-clouded and overwhelmed, #airplanemode 

Qadr Allahu wa Masha Fa’al

which means: Allah has decreed it and what He willed has happened
A phrase I first heard, spoken by an ustaz who was the moderator for the talk with Mufti Ustaz Fatris & Habib Ali Zaenal Abidin few weeks ago. He was referring to how it’s not easy to bring the both of them together yet the Qadr of Allah made it easy.
And so I was reminded of the phrase few days ago when I had a bout of mild food poisoning. Terrible, definitely. I couldn’t make it for kak Huda’s walimah and intuitively I sort of knew I couldn’t make it for the KL trip the next morning. True enough.

I had been looking forward to it all week, plans to go to the book fair and buy lotsa books, buy dresses and hijabs, explore the place, the food, basically a wind-down before I start prepping for my exams.

And I’ll end with this.

Grateful still,
For my ever-loving mum who cares for me in every inch possible
Despite her exhaustion
Decided to change her half-day work to today so she could cook for me
For my dad and little brother who cares too in their own ways
For a caring friend as well
Count your blessings
Always
If you think you’ve had it real rough
Know that it could’ve been worse
None of it will go to waste
An expiation of sins insyaAllah
Just be patient
Don’t complain
A lesson too
To teach you.

Rants.

i do seriously want to have real and honest conversations 

how to when the atmosphere is always of constant caution and anxiety
i dont want to gossip
but that’s what they like to do
how do i keep up
when i ask in honesty
but i was not treated seriously
.

why is it
i either say too little
or share too much
when i do share and the other person doesn’t pick up on it
when it’s actually something very important to me
or something i thought twice thrice before saying
and it just goes unattended to
a part of me dies a little inside

#rant #thisislife #justsmallstruggles #keeponmovingandworking